Learn to Love Again
by RaydorCakes
Summary: Sequel to my one-shot "Learn to Feel Again." With Andy as part of her protective detail, Sharon becomes more open about her personal life and her emotions.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Sequel to my one-shot "Learn to Feel Again." This story is set about one month after the previous one, and unfortunately Stroh is still on the loose. This will be a multi-chapter fic, so suggestions and critiques are gladly accepted (as always). Enjoy!_

_Told from Flynn's perspective_

* * *

"What is going on with you two?" I hear Rusty and Sharon in the living room as I get changed in the morning.

"Rusty I'm not sure that's any of your business." She replies calmly, as usual.

"Sorry."

I chuckle to myself as I run a comb through my hair, it was a good question. I knew what she was doing, she was keeping me at a distance in case something happened. It made sense, but it still hurt. She was afraid of what would happen if she truly opened herself up to me, what would happen if Stroh found out. After the first time we kissed she had set rules, because who would she be without rules? She had come to me with a piece of paper, folded neatly in fourths, and slipped it into my jacket pocket without saying a word. I walk over to the night stand and pick up the paper, slowly reading over it as I had every day for the past month.

_Andy- I really am happy with us, but for right now, I think this is how things have to be. Please don't be mad at me, I know sooner or later everything will work itself out. ~S _

_1\. You don't always need to protect me. Go spend time with everyone, you're not the one on lockdown. Provenza needs someone to watch the game with :) _  
_2\. I'll get rid of the wine, all you have to do is ask _  
_3\. We share a bed, but that's it. Pajamas are for sleeping in_  
_4\. I get the bathroom first _  
_5\. Don't answer my phone for me or else _  
_6\. Kisses are nice _  
_7\. I LOVE YOU!_

I smile and shake my head when I read number seven, it was another agreement we had come to without saying anything. Never once had the phrase 'I love you' crossed either of our lips. Instead, we started writing each other notes and placing them throughout the condo. Some simple '_I love you_'s' or '_Sharon you look stunning_'s' but Rusty had caught on to our little game and started leaving his own notes. Now there were a mish-mosh of notes strewn around the condo varying anywhere from '_I'm so in love with you_' to '_Sure you're not dating?_' and even '_Stop reading our notes and go do your homework_'.

"Hey Andy." Sharon knocks on the door, "You okay in there?"

"Yeah I'm good." I open the door and grin at her, her hair pulled into a messy bun atop her head, "Good morning beautiful."

"God morning to you too." She smiles and leans up, gently kissing my lips.

"Do you _have_ to do that?" Rusty mutters as he walks down the hallway, "You two are gross."

"If _we're_ gross then what would you call what you ate for breakfast?" She wraps an arm around my waist and turns to Rusty, quirking an eyebrow.

"Yeah Kid, what would you call that?" I tease, wrapping an arm around Sharon's shoulder.

"Delicious." He replies opening his bedroom door, "I'm gonna do some homework, keep it PG."

"Rusty!"

"Sorry Sharon." He laughs and closes his bedroom door.

* * *

"So what's the game-plan for today?" She asks as I pour us each a cup of coffee, "Since Taylor gave us the day off?"

"I don't know." I shrug, "If we leave the condo we'll have to take another officer with us, if you want to go out."

"Well," she grins, sitting down her coffee mug, "if we both take our badges and guns I don't think we'll need another officer."

"Sharon, we're going to follow protocol."

She shakes her head and laughs at me, "After all my years dealing with you in FID, I never thought I'd hear those words come out of _your_ mouth."

"Yeah, well, people change." I stand up and kiss her forehead, "I'm gonna go talk to the detail. Get changed if you want, and Sharon-"

"Hm?"

"Here." I lean down and passionately kiss her lips before sitting a note next to her coffee mug, "I'll be right back."

* * *

"Good morning Lieutenant."

"Morning Officer." I shrug, "Question for you."

"Shoot." He replies with a smile, rocking back on his heels.

"I am part of the Captain's protective detail, and she, well- she's _the Captain_." I'm babbling like an infant, "If I told you I wanted to take her out for a while, just for some fresh air, would we need a bracket officer?"

"I'm sorry Lieutenant, but you would, unless you want to take it up with Chief Taylor."

"No." I let out a puff of air and look at the ground, "Thank you."

"No problem." He smiles as I walk back into the apartment.

* * *

"Andy where are we going?" Sharon calls as I close the door to the condo, walking back to the table and sipping my coffee.

"Only to the office, unless you want a bracket officer."

"Hey, uhm," Rusty emerges from his room, a devious look on his face, "if you guys need some pointers I might be able to help."

"Russell Beck," Sharon sighs, walking out of the bedroom and towards us in the living room, "We will _not_ be evading the protective detail, and neither will _you_. Understood?"

"Yessss." He grumbles and turns back down the hallway, "Have fun on your non-date!"

I look over at Sharon and smile, she's wearing a long, light blue sundress that accentuates all of her curves. She looks _amazing_, as always, her hair wavy from being in a bun.

"If we're going to the office I need to change." She frowns, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly, "This is awful."

"Well gee," I shrug and roll my eyes sarcastically, "I'm not offended at all by that statement."

"Oh hush." She walks over and gently kisses my jaw, "Here's a note for you too." She smirks before scampering back down the hallway, the blue fabric churning and crashing like the ocean waves as she went.

* * *

I turn the note over in my hand, folded in half per our tradition, and open it carefully. My handwriting jumps back at me, the note I had given her earlier:

_I love you so much, today's going to be better. ~A_

Under my initial I read Sharon's neat, cursive writing:

_Love you more. ~S_


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Thanks to everyone that read and commented on the first chapter, I get really excited whenever my phone goes off with an email from one of you :) I was thinking and I had the idea to alternate this story between both Sharon and Andy's perspectives. Each chapter will be specifically by one character, and their name will be listed below. I've never really tried to write as Raydor before, so if it's super OOC, feel free to correct me. Enjoy!_

* * *

Sharon's perspective

* * *

He's really driving us to the precinct. I can't believe this. I really don't want to go to work today, but I don't want to stay cooped up at home either. As soon as Taylor sees us he's going to have a stroke! God forbid the Captain stops by on her day off! I shake my head at the though of a flustered Chief Taylor, throwing up his hands with a sigh.

"What's so funny?" Andy asks, looking over for a second as we drive down the road.

"Nothing." I reply, but this only makes me start to laugh, thinking of all the different ways Taylor could react to my appearance.

"That, that doesn't look like nothing." He shrugs, reaching over and gently taking my hand in his, "It's alright though, don't need to tell your boyfriend these things. I see." He jokes sarcastically, ghosting his thumb over the top of my hand and sending a chill through my body.

"Taylor." I chuckle, shaking my head again, "He's going to react worse than Provenza on Christmas."

"Good one." He smiles as we pull into the parking lot at the precinct, "You ready?"

"Yeah." I nod and squeeze his hand, leaning over and kissing his cheek, "Let's go."

* * *

"Captain, Lieutenant." Sykes sees us first, nodding her head and quickly going back to the murder board.

Andy and I enter the murder room and observe the team, when I notice an overly-exaggerated eye-roll from Provenza, "Flynn, come here please." He asks, a hint of frustration in his voice.

"Yeah."

"Lieutenant Tao, how is everyone doing?" I ask, walking over and situating myself in front of his desk.

"We caught a case this morning, but we have it almost wrapped up." He smiles and closes his folder.

"Louie!" Andy exclaims and jumps up from his chair, a hand flying to his cheek.

"What?" He asks with an innocent shrug.

"What are you two up to now?" I ask, no longer surprised or annoyed by their antics.

"Flynn here, he has a little something on his cheek." He grumbles, pointing at Andy with a thumb, "He won't let me wipe it off."

"He was going to lick his finger!" Flynn defends, his hands still firmly on his cheek, "He could've transferred some of his grumpiness to me!" He jokes.

"Or some brains." He sighs, going back to his paperwork, "Idiots."

"If anyone needs me, I will be in my office, Lieutenant Flynn and I will probably be leaving in about an hour. Keep up the good work."

* * *

Andy and I've been sitting in my office for almost five minutes now and he hasn't said anything or taken his hand off his cheek. I take my laptop out of my bag and open up Facebook, trying my best to look productive since I don't have any work to do.

"Are you gonna stay like that for the rest of the day?"

He sighs and slowly removes his hand, "Your lipstick, Sharon."

"Oh." I giggle and cover my mouth, I can feel the blush creeping across my face at the sight of the dark pink smudge on his, "Let me get that off. Do you have any water?"

"No." He shrugs.

"Oh, ah, okay." I stand up and walk to the other side of the desk, turning our chairs so we're facing each other. I'm more flustered than I should be and I feel like I'm going to catch on fire. I quickly look up to make sure the blinds are closed,_ I learned from last time, "_Now don't yell." I tease, licking my thumb and gently swiping it across his cheek, the pink becoming less intense, "I'm not grumpy."

"No." He chuckles as I wipe his cheek again, "It's not a big deal you know."

"I don't want anyone to know. Not yet." I sigh, the smudge now gone and my hand cupping his cheek, "Not until we find Stroh."

"I understand." He forces a smile and pats my leg, "But that won't change anything."

"Thank you." I grin and pull his face towards mine, pressing my lips strongly against his. _God, I love this man_.

"What was that for?" He asks happily, gently kissing my lips again.

"For doing what's best for Rusty and I, even when it's not what _you_ want. I lo-" There's a knock on the door and it flies open, I pull away from Andy and he wipes his face cautiously.

"Captain." Taylor sighs, "Lieutenant. Am I interrupting something?"

"No, Sir." I rise from my chair and walk over to Taylor, clasping my hands in front of myself, "Is there a problem?"

"It's just your day off, Captain, and with all this Stroh business I didn't expect to find you here."

"Well," I sigh and look at my feet, "The detail is a little stressful. I can't leave my condo without two officers, even more if Rusty's with me. It's been frustrating Sir, I apologize."

"Captain it's not a problem. I actually need to speak to Lieutenant Flynn in my office if it's not a problem."

"Not a problem at all Sir." I shake my head and step out of the doorway as Andy walks past, brushing his hand across the small of my back.

_What does he want with Andy?_

* * *

I have an idea for the Taylor/Andy conversation but I'd love to hear everyone else's thoughts as well! Comments are always appreciated, as are PM's.


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: I'm overjoyed by the positive feedback, all of you are amazing :) I don't know if nobody noticed or if no one felt like pointing it out, but Sharon was starting to say 'I love you' when Taylor burst in. As usual, I'm not James Duff, nor do I own these fabulous characters. The ideas however, with the exception of the Stroh plotline, are all mine. Enjoy!_

* * *

Andy's perspective

* * *

What could Taylor possibly want? I keep wiping my face as I follow him to his office, worried that Sharon's lipstick had left another mark. Did he see anything? Oh, I hope not. He would be _furious_, but he'd have to find out sooner or later, preferably later.

"Lieutenant Flynn, please take a seat." He instructs, his voice booming as always, "This should be a quick meeting so you can get back on with your day."

"Ah, thank you Sir." I nod and sit down, pulling at the bottom of my jacket, "So what is the problem?"

"The Captain." He sighs, sitting across from me and clasping his hands in his lap, "How is she holding up?"

_Really? That's all he wants to ask about? Okay._

"I think she's doing the best that can be expected of her." I reply honestly, rubbing my jaw, "It's been emotionally stressful for both her and Rusty, but I think they're doing okay."

"Really?" He asks, his voice still stern but with a hint of surprise, "Lieutenant I have another question." He reaches up and scratches his cheek, I can tell he is uncomfortable, "Why did she add you to the detail, not Sykes or Sanchez?"

"I made her add me."

"Well Flynn, she's not an easy woman to negotiate with, we both remember how things were at the beginning."

"The Captain and I are good friends, Sir. I didn't give her much of a choice about adding me to the detail. She can be stubborn but she knows what's good for her."

"Ah, I see." He sighs, "Is there anything else that needs to be brought to my attention?"

I swallow hard and think for a moment, _should I tell him about us?_ Not yet. I knew Sharon didn't want anyone to know yet, but Taylor already had an idea. _Everyone_ already had an idea.

"No Chief. Now if it's not a problem, I really should be getting her home, she doesn't like leaving Rusty alone for too long."

"I understand Flynn, keep her safe."

* * *

"You ready to go?" I prop myself in the doorway and smile at her, she's visibly nervous and it's making me uncomfortable.

"Just a minute." She smiles, closing her laptop and putting it in her bag, "Can we talk for a minute?"

"Uhm, yeah?" I feel my heartbeat pick up and I can't imagine what is wrong. I'm so happy and I thought she was too.

"Andy I need to tell you something-" she stands up and walks towards me slowly, fidgeting with her hands as she gets closer.

"Look, Sharon, if you don't want to do this anymore, that's fine, but I don't know if I can pretend like I don't feel anything for you, and I'm sure as _hell_ not leaving you and Rusty while Stroh is on the loose."

"Andy I'm not breaking up with you." She grins, biting her bottom lip and extending her hands. I take them gently and close the gap between us, I can smell her perfume and feel the warmth of her small hands in mine. I can't take it anymore.

"Sharon I-"

"I love you!" She exclaims happily with an adorable little hop, "And you have no idea how good that feels to say because I've felt it for so long now and-"

I drop my hands down to her waist and pull her flush against me, bringing her face up to mine for a long, passionate kiss, "I love you too, Sharon. And I have since-well- since before Nicole's wedding and I _never_ thought in a _million years_ I'd be holding you in my arms. I know I'm not the best at saying what I'm feeling and I know I can get angry, but _I love you_ and it feels so good to say it out loud."

She gently kisses my lips before leaning forward, our noses touching. I can feel her breath warm on my face and I can't help but smile, this new kind of intimacy surreal and refreshing, "I'm not one to know how to say what I feel either." She giggles, pecking my lips, "And I got so used to being alone and being treated badly that I never thought I'd be happy again. I'm happy with you," she kisses me again, almost as if I'm giving her the energy to keep talking, "I'm so much more than happy Andy, but I still haven't figured out how to put it all into words."

"Then don't." I grin, kissing her deeply before pulling a note out of my jacket pocket and placing it in her hand, "But I still love you."

"I love you more." She giggles, her emerald eyes sparkling as she unfolds the note.

I can't help but grin like an idiot as I watch her read it, I see a tear start to form in the corner of her eye and I gently brush it away with my thumb. She looks up at me and pulls both her lips into her mouth before wrapping her arms around my waist and starting to cry.

"Yes Andy, yes I'll marry you."

* * *

_If I didn't tell you yet, I'm sorry. I love you so much. More than anything in the world. You taught me how to love myself and how to love the people around me as well. You make me a better person every day, and I feel so cared for when I'm with you. I've never felt this way before, and I never want it to stop. Sharon Rose O'Dwyer Raydor will you spend the rest of your life with me? ~A_


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: Hey everyone! Sorry for the delay between updates! I've been nursing a sprained ankle with crutches and all that jazz, and have also been cram studying for finals. Anyways, on with the story!_

* * *

_Sharon's Perspective_

* * *

Andy and I never were what would have been considered the 'conventional couple.' Hell, we were dating for months and didn't even know it. Maybe that's part of what I like about him, about _us_, how we always managed to stray from the norm, but could still find a way to make it work. _And now we were getting married_. Just like that, in the middle of my office, without saying a word. It wasn't conventional, but it was us. _And I love it, I love him._

We had gone right back to the condo after that moment in my office, we quietly walked through the foyer hand-in-hand before going to Rusty's bedroom.

"Rusty, sweetie." I knock on the door and Andy squeezes my hand, we decided we have to make sure Rusty is okay with our getting married, ''Rusty?" I push his door open and see him sleeping in his bed. I chuckle to myself, that boy is _always_ sleeping.

"Come on Sleeping Beauty, wake up!" Andy exclaims before letting go of my hand and jumping onto the bed, Rusty yells and starts flailing before he realizes it's just Andy.

"Guys what the hell?!"

"Language Mister!"

"Sorry." He apologizes, "But what are you doing? What time is it?"

"Oh, about, uh," Andy reaches over and grabs Rusty's arm, pulling him over to look at his watch, "quarter to three."

"Rusty, there's actually something we need to talk about _as a family_, if you would like to go out for burgers or ice cream?"

"Ya know Sharon," he sighs, flopping back into the bed, "as much as I love burgers and ice cream, the detail, not so much."

"I know. I don't like them either." I grin, "Come on."

"Hey," Andy calls sarcastically as we leave the condo, "I'm part of the detail, don't you like me?"

* * *

Eventually, Andy and Rusty decide they want to stop at an ice cream cart in the middle of town, so the three of us, and the two bracket officers, do. I settle for a plain vanilla cone, Rusty for a chocolate one, and Andy for a fudge sundae, which I would probably end up eating anyways. I look to Andy as he eats his ice cream, wondering how we were going to make this announcement to Rusty without the detail finding out. _No one was supposed to know we were dating, and now we are getting married_.

"So, what's going on?" Rusty manages to ask between mouthfuls of ice cream, "What was _so important _that you had to wake me up?"

"Actually, Andy, take this." I hand him my ice cream cone and begin rooting through my pockets, I see him take a bite and I pause my search to glare at him, "Here Rusty." I hand him the note that Andy had given me, the two of us watching intently as he reads it.

"Really?"

"Mhm." I smile as Andy reaches down and gently takes my free hand, "As long as it's alright with you, Rusty. You know you come first, don't you?"

"I won't just have a mom anymore," Rusty exclaims happily, hugging Andy and me, "I'll have a mom _and a dad_."

"Yeah kid," Andy looks at me and I see a tear starting to form in the corner of his eye, he pats Rusty's back and kisses the top of his head, "yeah you will."

* * *

"So what is, like, why?" Rusty asks as we all huddle in the living room, drinking hot cocoa, "Why are you getting married now?"

"Well-" Andy starts and I gently tap his leg, his voice trailing off.

"Andy and I," I close my eyes and take a deep breath, I feel him lightly take my hand in his.

"Kid, what Sharon is trying to say is that," he squeezes my hand and I squeeze back, this is difficult for both of us, "I love your mother and she loves me. This world we live in, it's cruel. And with everything happening, I wanted us to get married while we knew we could. We don't know what can happen tomorrow, and especially with our jobs, we know how fragile life can really be. We, _well I_, didn't want to miss the opportunity while we had it."

"But nobody else knows?"

"No." We both say in unison, "Nobody even knew we were dating."

"You finally admitted it!" Rusty exclaims and smacks the arm of his chair, causing me to jump, "You finally admitted it!"

"Is that really necessary?" I ask, slightly confused as Andy rubs his thumb on my hand, "What's the big deal?"

"_You_." He throws up his hands in my direction, "Dating _you_." He points to Andy, "The one who lives by the rules and the one with a temper. _Dating_. Getting _married_."

"Uh, yeah." Andy responds cautiously, "That's exactly what's going on."

"You two are _crazy!_ I have to do homework, dinner later?"

"Of course." I chuckle with a smile as he walks off down the hallway.

* * *

Rusty has really started to take advantage of the protective detail. All he had them get us for dinner was burgers and fries (of course), but he just finds it so amusing that they have to get us food if we want it.

Now it's around 10:30 and Andy and I are getting ready to go to sleep. We have work tomorrow, _uugh_. I emerge from the bathroom in one of his t-shirts and a pair of sweatpants to see him curled up on the bed already half asleep. He looks so peaceful and happy, my pillow trapped between his arms where I normally lay. I quietly walk over and sit on the edge of the bed before running a hand through his hair.

"Oh Mr. Flynn." I call in a sing-songy voice as I continue to run my hand through his hair.

"Oh Mrs. Flynn." He smiles and opens his eyes, letting go of the pillow and placing it back at the top of the bed, "Lay with me?"

"I'd love to." I smile and kiss his temple before crawling beneath the covers.

* * *

"I can't believe we're doing this." I chuckle and drape my arms over his shoulders in bed, "We really are idiots."

"Maybe." He grins and kisses my lips, "But this is what you want, isn't it?"

I pull away. I don't mean to, but I do. Almost because I'm shocked he would ask me something like that. I look at him and I can immediately see the pain start to flood his oaky eyes.

"Yes, Andy, of course I do, why wouldn't I?" I place a long, passionate kiss to his lips to try and reassure him, "I _love_ you."

"I love you too Sharon." He smiles and pulls me closer to him, I can feel the heat radiating from our bodies beneath the covers, "But are you _sure_? After everything Jack put you through and Stroh out there and-"

"Andy, shhh." I whisper and press my index finger to his lips, "Where's the list I gave you?" I ask, untangling myself from him and rising from the bed, "I know you still have it."

"It's, it's in the drawer." He points to the end table to my right and I open the drawer and remove the list, quickly hurrying off to the kitchen.

"Stay here, Mr. Flynn." I tease, "I'll be right back."

"You better."

* * *

I walk out to the kitchen and find a pen in one of the drawers, carefully unfolding the list I had given Andy. I smile as I read through the list, remembering what I had written and how far we had come in such a short time. I start to write on the list, adding numbers eight and nine.

_Andy- I really am happy with us, but for right now, I think this is how things have to be. Please don't be mad at me, I know sooner or later everything will work itself out. ~S_

_1\. You don't always need to protect me. Go spend time with everyone, you're not the one on lockdown. Provenza needs someone to watch the game with :) _  
_2\. I'll get rid of the wine, all you have to do is ask _  
_3\. We share a bed, but that's it. Pajamas are for sleeping in_  
_4\. I get the bathroom first _  
_5\. Don't answer my phone for me or else _  
_6\. Kisses are nice _  
_7\. I LOVE YOU!  
8\. Don't you ever doubt my feelings for you  
9\. We'll get through this, I promise_

I fold the paper back up and go back to the bedroom to see Andy nervously pacing around the bed and through the bathroom.

"Andy? Are you alright?"

"Sharon." He lets out a sigh and walks over to me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders and squeezing me tightly, "I'm going to be a father again."

"You don't have to do it." I smile sadly into his chest, he's scared, for _all of us_.

"That was the first thing he said, that he was finally going to have a father."

"Hey," I pull out to look at him, a few stray tears running down his cheeks, "he _wants_ you in his life. He _wants_ you to live with us and go to dinner with us, watch movies and play games with us. You're a part of this family now, and he's not one to say it, but he loves you Andy, and so do I. Let's get to bed, okay?"

"You're right." He grins and kisses my forehead, "I love you, and I love Rusty too. We're gonna be a _family_. Us. Who wouldda thought?"

"No one." I grin and place the list back in the drawer before turning off the lamp and crawling back into bed.


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: This chapter is dedicated to my amazing new friend, Kiki_JK. Sometimes life throws us curveballs and we become stronger for it. Keep your chin up beautiful girl~_

* * *

_Sharon's Perspective_

* * *

I'm holding the case file in my hands and all I can think about is the first victim in the library. _I don't even remember her name._ This victim, the second, I know she's just another on the list of many, and I can feel in my chest that Stroh is the one who did this. _Because he is still out there and he won't let us forget it_.

"Sharon, let me take you home ." Andy persists for what feels like the hundredth time today, and I know he's just trying to protect me, "Please."

"No." I reply simply, standing from my desk and walking towards the door, tapping the folder in my hand, "I _have_ to do this, and you _have_ to let me."

"Sharon, I don't want to lose you."

"You won't Andy, I promise you that. And that woman in the morgue, _she's not me_. We have to put on our brave faces for everyone else and do our jobs, alright?"

"Alright." He rises from his chair, walking towards me and grinning that crooked grin of his, "Let's go talk to Morales."

"Let's go." I smile sadly, leaning up and pressing a quick kiss to his lips, "I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

"Doctor, what did you find out?" I ask, my voice shakier than I had anticipated.

"Your victim suffered trauma to the trachea, and the hyoid bone was broken. I'd say that's your cause of death."

"So she... She was choked?" I question shakily.

"Actually, it looks like she was killed with something like a garrote. It wasn't sharp enough to nick the carotid, but it was dull enough to crush the hyoid."

"She was attacked from behind." I deduce and quickly look at Andy, his eyes conveying an emotion I had never seen.

"I'd say so." Morales answers, turning the victim's neck to expose where the rope had been pulled, her neck red and raw.

I can feel myself start shaking involuntarily and everything starts to turn cloudy when I feel Andy's strong arm around my waist, "Come on, let's get you out of here."

* * *

He could tell there was something wrong, he wasted no time ushering me out of the morgue and into the adjoining hallway. I carefully sit down on one of the benches, taking off the blue autopsy gown and throwing it to the ground violently. Andy frowns slightly, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the wall opposite from me.

"Thank you." I say quietly, gently kicking the gown back and forth across the floor, "I don't know how much more of that I could've handled."

"We're gonna get through this you know?" He smiles, walking towards me and kneeling down, placing his hands on my knees and rubbing gentle circles, "Never forget number nine."

"Number nine." I shake my head and close my eyes, willing away the tears that were waiting to fall, "Number nine. _We'll get through this, I promise._"

"That's the one." He grins, reaching up and taking my hands in his, "What was number six again?" He asks sarcastically, "I don't remember."

"Kisses are nice." I respond, my voice just above a whisper, "Can you refresh my memory Lieutenant? I don't remember what seven was."

"I love you, Sharon." He chuckles, leaning forward and gently kissing my lips, "Let's go see what the others found out."

* * *

"What did you find out?" Andy asks as we join the rest of the team in the Murder Room. They all turn to look in our direction before the four of them proceed to the murder board and turn it around.

"Detective Sykes, what are you doing?" I ask, slightly irritated by whatever was going on here, "Is this or is this not an active investigation?"

"It is ma'am, however we uncovered some startling details that we would like to process before we present it to you."

"Yes. Of course." I reply bitterly, nodding and walking towards my office without another word.

* * *

It's not a secret that I often watch the team work from the comfort of my office. I like being able to see what's going on, to look at the evidence and create my own hypothesis, without the commotion the team can often cause. But not today. Today, the team had brought up old case files from evidence and stacked them on the desks, obscuring my view of the murder board, no doubt on purpose.

I sigh and rub my eyes, picking up my phone and composing a text to Andy:

_What is going on?_

I watch him take his phone from his pocket and let out a puff of air before responding:

_Louie and I are going to talk to the Chief, then we'll brief you. Go get something to eat. I'm sure Sykes is hungry too. I love you_.

What the hell could they have discovered? I clench the phone tightly in my hand for a moment and close my eyes before responding:

_I'm not happy about this but okay. Love you too_.

* * *

"So Captain, how is Rusty doing?" Amy asks as we sit eating our salads in the break-room.

"Same as always." I chuckle, pushing a tomato across my plate, "This is more than anything someone his age should have to deal with."

"What about you?" She asks bluntly, and I can't help the noise of surprise that escapes my lips at her question.

"What... What about me?" I ask, toying with the same tomato, "I'm not sure I follow."

"Captain," she sets her fork down and looks at me intently, her mahogany eyes burning holes into me, "how are _you_ dealing with all of this?"

_How am I dealing with this?_ There is a serial killer and rapist picking victims that look just like me. My son's life is in danger _again_, and the man I love; I put him in danger just by loving him. I'm really not doing well, but I can't tell her that.

"Alright, I guess." I answer, stabbing a piece of lettuce and watching as it falls off of my fork and back to the rest of the salad, "Thank you for checking."

"You should eat something." She deadpans, _again_, "You haven't eaten anything the entire time we've been sitting here."

"Amy, I am a grown woman and your superior officer, I think I can feed myself."

"I didn't mean to offend you, Captain, but we're all worried about you and Rusty. I'm just trying to help."

"Thank you." I force a smile, "I should be meeting with Lieutenant Flynn soon, and I hope that whatever shenanigans you all have planned will be put to rest."

* * *

I couldn't believe what he was telling me. The previous victim had just looked similar to me, she was the same age, same height, same hair and eyes. But this one, this one was completely different, confirming my theory that Stroh was behind this.

"The victim's name is Sharon." I respond nonchalantly, tapping my pen on my desk calendar, "What else is the big deal?"

"Well, Captain, this is where it gets weird. Are you sure you want me to go on?"

"Mhm." I nod and close my eyes, taking in the information as Andy gives it to me.

"Victim is Sharon O'Connor, age fifty-six, five-foot-six. Married a lawyer when she was in her twenties, and filed for divorce this November. The husband has ignored her thus far, so the divorce was never finalized. She was a well-known women's rights activist and has two children, both in their twenties, one boy and one girl."

I slowly open my eyes and look at Andy, I can see the concern etched on his face, the wrinkles around his eyes much more evident today, "He's profiling. Not just appearance anymore. He knows everything about them, their relationship history, familial status, their occupation. Stroh is somewhere that he has access to all of these people, somewhere where their history is readily accessible, or they confide in him." In a stroke of genius I quickly pull my sidearm from my desk drawer and push myself out of the chair, "I know where he is. Get the team, and get S.W.A.T."


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: I'm really lazy when it comes to updating, and for that I apologize. Per usual, I'm not James Duff, and I love receiving comments and PM's._

* * *

_Andy's Perspective_

* * *

"Sharon, where are we going?" I ask as she hurries throughout the Murder Room, her heels clicking on the floor.

"I'll explain in the car." She says in passing, "Lieutenants, Detectives, I said _let's go. Now_."

* * *

"Now, where are we going?" I try again once we are both in the SUV and headed down the highway, "How do you know where we're going? What's going on?"

"Andy, I," she lets out a puff of air in an attempt to move the hair that has fallen in front of her eyes, "if I tell you this, you have to promise to keep your temper cool, okay?"

_What the hell?_ Sharon doesn't keep secrets, especially from me, "I promise." I offer a resigned smile, reaching over and placing my hand on top of hers in the hopes of easing the burden she was carrying, "You know you don't have to tell me."

"No Andy, _I do_." She replies sternly, "It's something I should have told you a long time ago." She swallows hard and glances in my direction, her eyes full of emotion, "When I was still married to Jack, and I... I walked in on him with another woman." She takes a deep breath, "I confronted him and he- he hit me and started screaming so I," tears are slowly streaming down her face, I gently reach over and wipe them away, "I thought it would be best for our family if I sought help. I found a psychiatric hospital that also took patients for singular appointments. After Stroh came back I-"

"You don't have to tell me all of this." I urge, knowing full well the emotional toll this is taking on her, "If you're taking us to the right place, that's all that counts."

"But Andy, at some point someone will ask the same question you are, and that person will want an answer in front of the courts. Let me just tell you this now so I can get it off of my chest, okay?"

"Of course, Sharon." I rub the top of her hand with my thumb as she continues her story.

"When Stroh came back, I couldn't handle the stress of what I was feeling, so I started going back. I felt like I needed someone to talk to and the people there, well, it's their job. If Stroh's been watching me, he knows I've been there and he'd have the perfect victim pool."

"Damn." I sigh and lean back in my seat, closing my eyes for a moment, "Sharon, I'm so sorry."

"I don't want your pity." She replies quietly, "We're almost there."

* * *

"What is going on?" Sharon asks authoritatively as we arrive on scene, "What the hell, people?"

There is a hustle and bustle outside of the facility, nurses and doctors rushing around, escorting patients wrapped in their blankets. I can tell by Sharon's reaction that this is _not_ normal, and that sets us both a little more on edge.

"Hello, are you... are you the police?" One of the nurses rushes up and asks me.

"Yes ma'am, we are. What's going on?"

"HELP! HELP!" One of the patients runs from the building screaming, nearly knocking Sharon over.

"Someone's been murdered."

"Shit!" I exclaim and draw my gun before jogging into the building, hoping that Stroh was still on the premises.

* * *

"We found the victim." Sharon informs me quietly, placing a hand on my chest and pushing me away from the hospital room, "I can't let you go in there?"

"Why?" I ask lowly, "Sharon, what's happening?"

"Andy, just don't. I need you to trust me, okay?" She asks, leaning forward so her forehead rests on my shoulder, "_Please, just trust me._"

I knew exactly what this meant, she was doing to me what we had done to her when we found the previous victim. Attacking Rusty was bad enough, but attacking Sharon and then me? I would go through hell to protect the two of them and she damn well knew it.

"I do trust you." I answer quietly, wrapping an arm around her back and beginning to rub circles there, "But if this is an attack on me now, you _have_ to let me do this."

"Andy I don't-"

"Sharon, please." I beg, kissing the side of her head before untangling my arms from her, "_Please_."

"Andy," she sighs, pulling her head away but not looking up at me, "if you act up at all, you're out. I love you."

"I love you too." I whisper, leaning forward and quickly kissing her forehead before turning towards the hospital room.

* * *

Now I understood what Sharon had meant. This was worse than anything I'd have ever imagined. This man, he's me in every way. He's laying on the hospital floor, his light blue dress shirt torn and his black and white tie pulled snugly around his neck. His hair was greying and his dark eyes were drained of the life they previously held. He wore the same black dress shoes and pants that I often wore, his suit jacket discarded in the corner of the room.

"Andy, are you okay?" Sharon whispers, walking over and standing beside me, "I know how surreal this can be."

"Yeah, ah, yeah." I sigh, rubbing my jaw, "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" She questions, leaning over and lightly bumping my shoulder like she had so long ago, "It doesn't get any easier to deal with."

"Flynn, come here for a moment!" Provenza barks before leaving the room, "_Now, you_ _idiot!_"

* * *

"Louie, what?" I ask, slightly annoyed at the venom in his words, "What the hell?"

"Well Flynn," he starts, placing his hands on his hips, "you wouldn't have happened to have completely lost your mind and proposed to the Captain, would you?"

What? Was now really the time to be asking these questions? I was laying dead in the other room.

"Louie, I'll tell you later." I sigh, turning and walking back towards the room, "We have a murder to solve."

"Flynn!" Provenza exclaims and grabs my sleeve, pulling me back towards him with a force I had never experienced before, "This is evident to the case, so tell me, _are you_ _or aren't you engaged?_"

"I am. _We_ are." I sigh, pulling my arm away from him.

"Ye Gods!" He bursts out a little too loudly, "Captain, a moment please?"

"Hm?" She hums, walking over and standing next to me, crossing her arms over her chest, "What seems to be the problem Lieutenant?"

"Listen," he whispers, "you two are extremely bright, and I'm happy for the both of you. It took you long enough." He remarks sarcastically, "But you can't hide it anymore."

"Lieutenant, I think you are overstepping a line here." Sharon informs him angrily, "This is not your business to be interfering with."

"Oh, it'll be _everyone's_ business soon enough." He mutters before walking away.****

* * *

Sharon's pacing around her office, her index finger curled around her lip. I can't do much other than sit and watch her, she doesn't know what to say right now, and honestly neither do I. I can't help but pick up the evidence bag and turn it over in my hands for what feels like the hundredth time, the small velvet box now a grim reminder instead of a symbol of love. The victim, my doppelgänger, he had an engagement ring in his jacket pocket. Stroh had even gotten that exactly right, it was the perfect ring for Sharon, probably what I would've picked.

"We have to tell Taylor." She finally says, stopping next to my chair and tapping her finger on her lip, "Provenza was right. We can't pretend anymore."

"Are you sure? He's going to hold that over our heads, Sharon."

"No one is going to believe that Stroh got a detail like that wrong. He doesn't make mistakes."

"Well, ah, okay." I try, "Uhm, who said I was proposing to you?"

She looks at me and rolls her eyes, "Everyone has an idea about us Andy. Honestly, it was just a matter of time. We have to tell Taylor."

* * *

"Captain, Lieutenant, how can I help you?" He asks as I usher Sharon into his office.

"Actually Chief," Sharon begins, covering a cough before continuing, "there is a matter that needs to be brought to your attention." She sits down and places her hands in her lap, Taylor extends his arms and leans on his desk attentively.

"And what would that be?" He asks in that smart ass tone of his that makes my blood boil, "Is it about the new case?"

"Well, yes and no." Sharon shrugs, gently shaking her head, "It's a little more complicated than that."

"Chief, what the Captain is trying to say is that our relationship status within the department needs to be changed."

"Really." He responds bitterly, "And you waited until the middle of a high-profile case to bring it to my attention?"

"It's more complicated than that." Sharon defends, "You are aware that Stroh is profiling victims based off of me, correct?"

"Yes." He sighs, clearly annoyed, "Please get to the point, Captain."

"The latest victim, he looks very similar to Lieutenant Flynn, and Buzz found an engagement ring in his pocket."

"You two wouldn't have gone and gotten engaged without informing me, would you?" He prods, reaching into his desk and pulling out two forms.

"Well, ah, sort of, Sir." I respond, leaning on Sharon's chair.

"I see." He looks at me angrily, "So how long has this really been going on?"

"About two months, Chief." Sharon answers as he places a piece of paper in front of her and one in front of the empty chair for me.

"You waited two months to inform your superior officer of something like this? Raydor, of all people I thought you would've told me."

"Sir," she sighs, "this is a _very_ delicate situation, which is why we kept the information from you. Stroh has eyes and ears _everywhere_, and I was afraid that if he found out, something like _this_ would happen."

I sit down and look over the form as Taylor contemplates what to do, "How do you know this isn't a coincidence?"

Sharon drops her pen and looks at him with eyes that could start a fire, "Do you _honestly_ believe in coincidences Sir? Stroh has been after us since day one. Do you remember Wade Weller? Because that's the man Stroh hired to _assassinate_ my son. And let's not forget that speech about destiny and fate he gave Rusty. He told Rusty that their lives are intertwined, and that hasn't stopped since the day he escaped. Everything revolves around Stroh, even the previous two victims looked like me. Stroh knew we got engaged, when no one else knew. So no, Sir, I _do not _believe this is just a coincidence."

"How can I help?" He asks, surprising both Sharon and me with his change in demeanor, "Anything you need at your disposal, I will get it for you."

"I need the video footage from the hospital for the past two weeks." She replies calmly, signing her name at the bottom of the paper, "I need a list of his known associates and witness statements from _everyone_ in the hospital. We need to find him _now_."

"I'll get the team right on it, Captain." He replies, pressing his lips into a thin line as I sign my name, "Go to your _respective_ homes and get some rest, understood?"

"Yes Sir." We both reply and hurry out of his office.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: That Drabble series left me no time to update this story, but with a six hour car-ride, I figured I may as well be productive. Regular updates should be back! Comments and PM's would be greatly appreciated.

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Sharon's perspective

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Chief Taylor had no right to separate Andy and I like that. He's a part of my protective detail and God knows Andy does a better job of protecting us than all of the other officers combined! I knew something like this would happen, but the truth of the matter was that we couldn't hide anymore. God knows I want to, but we can't. Not when Stroh is out there killing based off of me and my relationships. But how did he find out about our engagement? That's bothered me since we found the victim that looked like Andy. We've managed to keep our relationship pretty quiet, it's just how we are. Yet somehow Stroh found out. Sitting here knowing a serial killer is on the loose is driving me insane, and I'm sure Andy's not doing any better.

My phone vibrating startles me from my thoughts, I'm already slightly paranoid if I'm being honest with myself, and being separated from the love of my life isn't helping.

"Hi." I greet, hoping he can't hear the mix of emotions in my voice but I know he will. He always reads me so well.

"How are you doing?" He asks, the pain in his voice nearly a mirror of mine, "I miss you."

"I miss you too Andy." I force a smile out of habit, walking over to the couch and sitting down, crossing my legs under myself, "I'd feel so much safer if you were here. This isn't fair."

"I'd feel better knowing you were safe too." He sighs, "And I can't believe I'm saying this but Taylor's doing what he thinks is right."

"We're not doing anything wrong." I frown into the phone, "We haven't even..."

"Taylor sees us as a liability. Just imagine if Stroh showed up and we were making love." He laughs, "That wouldn't look too good for the Chief."

"No, it wouldn't. You're right." I giggle, finding myself glad that Andy isn't here to see the blush I'm sure is creeping up my cheeks, "But it would make for quite the news story."

"Wouldn't it." He chuckles again, "'LAPD Captain and Lieutenant arrest high-profile serial killer Phillip Stroh after making love.' I can see it now."

"Andy!" I snort and my hand flies up to cover my mouth, I fall forward in embarrassment, laughing into one of the throw pillows.

"Sharon are you okay?" He laughs as well, both of us struggling to steady our breathing.

"Yeah. Yeah... I'm... I'm okay." I laugh, getting up from the couch and going to the kitchen for a glass of water, "I just can't believe you!"

"You started it!" He defends, and in my minds eye I can see him throwing up his hands, "You're the one that said it would be an interesting news story!"

"You continued!" I laugh again as I sip my water, grateful for the cool in contrast to my happily burning body.

"And your point is...?" He asks sarcastically, "Mrs. Flynn I fail to see your argument." I can't help the little skip my heart does when I hear him call me that, it's so surreal and crazy to think we're in love and getting married (but I wouldn't trade it for anything.)

"Mr. Flynn," I smirk, heading down the hallway towards our bedroom, "It's getting late and I'm tired."

"Sharon," he calls quietly, "can we keep talking though? I'd just feel a lot better if I could hear your voice."

It means a lot for him to say that. Jack never said things like that, never bothered to call when he was away, "Of course. But I'm going to put you on speaker so I can get changed. Is that alright?"

"Yeah. I should get changed too. I didn't realize how late it was."

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"You're wearing my shirt, aren't you?" He questions as I curl up on the bed, taking off my glasses and rubbing my eyes.

"No." I reply sarcastically with a smile, "Why would I do that?"

"Because you do it when we're together and you miss me. Let me guess which one."

"Oh, okay." I decide to humor him, pulling his shirt tighter around myself as I curl up in bed. It smells like him, his scent that's so musky, like campfires and smoke, it's just Andy.

"Hm." He mumbles, "I know you like my t-shirts."

"Warmer." I grin, wishing he was here by settling for what we had.

"And it'd probably be one of the ones that was in the washbin, so it'd still smell like me."

"How'd you guess?" I laugh, almost embarrassed at how well he knew me.

"So that narrows it down to three shirts..." He says and I can hear him tap his finger on his lip, "So it's either my white tee, my dodgers tee, or my work one. You wouldn't wear the white one, I think when I was cooking I got tomatoes or something all over it so it's a mess. You wouldn't wear my LAPD tee because you have your own, so that just leaves the Dodgers shirt." I can almost hear the grin in his voice.

"So what if it is?" I laugh, wrapping the quilts tighter around my body, the emptiness of our bed suddenly becoming real, "It smells good."

"I don't have anything of yours at my place." He says sadly, and I feel a pang of guilt for that. My condo became our place, that's just how it happened.

"I'm sorry." I yawn, my eyes clouding up, "You have my voice. I know that's not quite the same but-"

"It's perfect." He assures me, "I can't wait to see you tomorrow."

"I can't wait to see you either." I reply honestly, "But I'm not sure if Taylor'll be ready for us tomorrow."

"Well he better get ready. I'm not just gonna sit here under guard while Stroh runs throughout the city."

"Actually..." Oh God, what am I thinking? "Maybe we should drop the detail. They aren't doing anything. I just need you here, not them."

"Sharon, that's not a good idea." He instantly becomes defensive, "You know it's not a good idea and I won't let you do that."

"Andy, I'm tired. Rusty's tired. We're all tired of hiding behind these guards and not living our lives. I'm tired of sacrificing our relationship and my relationship with my son over this. Rusty hasn't wanted this since the beginning but he's been cooperative. I think it's time we start trying to move on."

"It's not safe." He breathes out, "I don't want either of you in danger, it's bad enough seeing victims that look like you and -"

"Don't you think I know that?!" I exclaim a little too loudly, "You seem to forget that one of those victims was you."

"And two were you." He counters, "I just don't want the next one to be the real you."

"She won't be." I reply sharply, frustrated at him for controlling me so much, "Good night Lieutenant." I sigh.

"Good night Sharon, I love you."


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: These characters aren't mine, but the mistakes are. Feel free to comment and PM me!

A/N(2): Special thanks to ProfTweety who I think has commented on every chapter of every Shandy work I've written. It always puts a smile on my face :')

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Andy's perspective

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_Lieutenant_. She called me _Lieutenant_. I haven't been her _Lieutenant_ for quite some time now. I've been Andy, her guard, her fiancé, the man that loves her. But suddenly I'm her Lieutenant again.

Dropping the guard is reckless. It's dangerous. It's suicide. And most of all, it goes against protocol. That's what worries me most. Sharon has always been one to follow the rules to a tee, but now she's throwing all caution to the wind and opening herself up to get hurt.

And it's my fault. _All of this is my fault_. I got involved, even though I knew how fragile the situation was. I proposed, knowing how fragile the situation was. She's going to get herself killed and it's all my fault. I love her and I want to make her my wife, but this- this makes me question everything. I was stupid, headstrong, and acting on impulse. The urge to taste her lips, the need to feel her petite body pressed against mine, the yearning to confess my love. _It was all on an impulse, and that impulse was destroying everything we'd worked to create_.

She won't even look at me. After all of the awful things I said about her when she was in FID, she would atleast tolerate me. Now, I'm just trying to protect her and she shuts me out. She locked herself in her office and she's not answering her phone. This is all my fault, but I can't let her go.

"Flynn!" Provenza yells, startling me.

"Uh, yeah?" I look up at him, standing in front of the murder board.

"What the hell's gotten into you?" He asks grumpily.

"Sir, I mean no disrespect," Sanchez interrupts, "but the last victim..." His voice trails off.

_That's fine. Let them think that's all that was on my mind, it'll just be easier that way. For all of us._

"Did you see a shrink?" Provenza asks as he walks over, resting his hands on his hips.

"No. I'm fine."

"You don't look fine Andy." He argues and looks towards the Captain's office, the door still closed and blinds drawn shut, "It's _her_, isn't it?"

"Louie..." I sigh, rubbing my temples at the first sign of an impending headache, "It's not important."

"That's a flat out lie and you know it. Go over there and fix whatever you did."

"I didn't do anything wrong." I grumble, standing up and pulling my jacket down before running a hand through my hair.

"Go fix it anyway. You love her, you won't just let this happen." He offers an encouraging smile and squeezes my arm, "Go."

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The look of sadness on her face when she opened the door clued me in to how much this was hurting her. She hesitated slightly, moving to close the door before thinking better of it and allowing me to enter. She wouldn't cause a scene, especially not here. Atleast that part of her was still predictable.

"Hello Lieutenant." She greets as she sits down, her voice heavy.

"Sharon, look-" I sit across from her and rest my forearms on her desk.

"Lieutenant I'm not discussing personal matters with you. Not here. If that's all you wanted then I suggest you leave."

**_The Ice Queen was back._**

"One of the most personal moments in my life happened in this office." I respond, "Didn't seem to be a problem then."

"I appreciate your concern, I really do." She won't look me in the eyes, "But this is _my_ life and _my_ son. This decision isn't yours."

"You said you would marry me in this office, these four walls. In fact, it wasn't all that long ago."

"Please don't do this right now." She begs, finally meeting my eyes, a world of emotion shining through, "I promise we'll talk, just not here. Not right now."

I eye her carefully, trying not to understand what she was thinking. She was usually so easy to read, but Darth Raydor was back and she meant _business_.

"I want you to have this." I hesitantly remove the ring from my right pinky and place it in her hand.

"Lieutenant, I don't want this." She sighs and sits it back down in front of me, "This is your AA ring. I have no use for it."

"Say my name." I demand, rubbing the deep groove on my finger, "Is it that hard for you to _say my name?_"

"I am not in the right frame of mind to do this right now. I told you that multiple times." She raises her voice just enough to prove her point, "You have turned this into a personal matter whereas it should remain strictly professional. We both let our emotions cloud our judgement. _This is why we were never supposed to get involved._ We put sugar in the coffee and now we can't take it back. I need you to be my Lieutenant right now, and as much as I need you in my personal life, I need you to respect my decision as my _colleague_ and not as the man I _love_. Can you do that for me? Please?" She asks, her voice nearly breaking, "I promise we'll talk, really talk tonight, okay?"

"Alright." I sigh defeatedly, pushing the ring back towards her before leaving the office.

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"Well, how'd it go?" Provenza huffs, quickly following me towards the break room.

"It didn't, okay?!" I snap, angrily pouring myself a cup of coffee.

"What is going on?!" He throws his hands up in frustration, "What the _hell_ is with you two?!"

"She wants to drop the detail." I say, watching as he instantly falls quiet.

"Don't let her do that Flynn, for the love of God." He responds quietly.

"I told her it wasn't safe and she got mad. She was ignoring me, but she said she'll explain everything later."

"As soon as Stroh finds out she dropped the detail, _he'll kill her_." He states lowly.

"You think I don't know that?!" I exclaim, sending coffe sloshing out of my mug, "Don't you think I've thought about this?!"

"Don't yell at me." Provenza commands, "You'll mess up your pressure."

"I can't talk her out of it, she just won't listen. She's not even giving me a say in it. She said it's her life and her son and that I need to respect her decision._ I can't_. We've built a life together and we were gonna get married and she's throwing it all away. For what?"

"For you." He grumbles, removing a water bottle from the refrigerator, "She's doing this for _you_."

"I have to stop her." I sigh, pushing past him and walking slowly back towards the murder room.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Thanks for all the sweet reviews! As promised, their conversation! Enjoy :)

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Sharon's perspective

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I can't ignore him, no matter how much I want to. I love him too much to hurt him more than I already have. This wasn't supposed to happen. _None of this was supposed to happen. _

If I hadn't kissed him all those months ago, we wouldn't be fighting. But I had and we were.

We decided to talk at his condo, and that frightened me a little. But this conversation needed to happen, and let come what may. I don't want to end our relationship over this, but he has to let me make my own decisions both as his superior officer and his friend.

"Sharon," I look up from my seat on the couch at the sound of his voice, "would you like a drink?"

"Water, please." I nod quickly, running a hand through my hair in a failed attempt to calm myself. _So many things could go wrong in a matter of minutes. _

"Here ya go." He smiles hesitantly, handing me a glass of water before sitting down, "So, talk."

_He's pissed. I understand that, but so am I. Damn him for caring so much_.

"You know I love you, don't you?" I ask, taking a sip of the water. He nods and folds his hands in his lap, "I want to drop the detail because I love you. I'm tired of hiding Andy. I'm tired of living my life looking over my shoulder. I'm a police Captain for heaven's sake! I need to get back to my life, my _real_ life."

He looks at his hands for a moment as he formulates an answer, "And I won't let you drop the guard because _I love you._ It's a two way street Sharon. Your safety is more important than our relationship because without you there _is_ no relationship."

_He was right, but I'm tired. Stroh is in the city somewhere, and the more guards I have, the more people will end up dying when he finally comes after Rusty and I. I don't want to be the cause of collateral damage._

"Nodus Tollens." I settle for instead, watching as a puzzled look works its way across his face.

"What?"

"It's Latin." I nod, sipping again, "It's a way of saying my life doesn't make sense to me anymore. I've gotten so sidetracked from the way things were before that I don't even know who I am now. Everything was so easy before." I shake my head, "This, this has thrown me so far out of my element that I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing with my life." I raise my eyes to meet his, "But hiding from a serial killer is _definitely not_ it."

"I... I can't let you do this. As soon as Stroh finds out he'll come after you."

"Let him." I reply stubbornly, watching as his eyes darken angrily.

"Sharon-"

"Stay or go, it's your choice, but I want to get back to living my life, and if you so choose, _our_ life."

"I won't let you fall on a sword for me." He grumbles, his jaw clenching, "You have Rusty, Ricky, and Emily to think about before you go off and get yourself killed. Did you ever think about the Kid?! What do you think will happen to him if you get hurt or worse?"

_He's right, but I won't admit it. I'm being selfish, terribly selfish. _

"Rusty is an adult. Yes, I am his _mother_, but he is an adult now. All of my children know the risks we take with our job."

He's biting his tongue and I can tell. I want him to yell at me, I want him to tell me what's actually on his mind instead of trying to be polite. _I want to know what he's __**really**__ thinking_.

"He'll have lost _two_ mothers then." He gets up and goes to the refrigerator for a soda before returning to his chair, "Stop being so damn selfish Sharon. For the first time in your life you're being selfish and it's going to get you killed." _That's more like the Andy I know_, "Rusty won't know what to do with himself if something happens to you. _I'm not worth this._"

"You are." This is the choice I have made and I won't let him change my mind.

"Don't give me that Romeo and Juliet bullshit Sharon. Am I really worth it if it'll get you killed?! Think about everyone else! Your kids will have lost both of their parents, and I'll have lost..." His voice trails off.

"Andy..." I walk over and stand in front of him, looking down sadly, "This situation is frightening for me as well, but I can't live like this. I'm trapped, I feel like I'm drowning. It's not healthy."

"No, your need to go on this suicide mission is not healthy!" He stands up quickly, his dark eyes burning into mine, "I don't want to watch you destroy yourself, _especially_ not for me."

"Then don't watch." I growl, not wanting to do this to us, "I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and if that's until Stroh decides _then so be it_."

"You _can't_." He argues, grabbing my shoulders in a surprisingly comforting way, "Dammit Sharon." He sighs, looking at me sadly, "When Stroh gets to you he'll just run off again. You dying won't help anyone."

"I've made my decision." I state firmly, "Either you accept it or you move on. I don't care which." I lie.

"Fine." He sighs, pulling me into a tight hug, "Drop the damned detail. But you're not leaving my side, and neither is Rusty."

"I know." I laugh, inhaling the scent of his cologne, "I love you."

"I love you too." He kisses the top of my head, "We'll need to teach the Kid how to shoot."

"Oh God!" I groan, pulling out to look at him, "Seriously?!"

"Yes." He nods, kissing my forehead, "And we'll need to install a security system, oh, and atleast one gun in _every_ room."

"Really?" I pout, knowing he's right, "It seems a little overkill."

"It's not overkill until that bastard's dead."


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: These characters aren't mine, the amazing James Duff has that distinction. Enjoy!

ASASASASASASASAS

Andy's perspective

ASASASASASASASAS

Like hell I'm letting her drop the guard. If she thinks I'm going down without a fight she hasn't learned anything. I'm not leaving her exposed and vulnerable. Not now, not _ever_.

She stirs in my arms and I tighten my grip around her waist, pulling her closer, "Good morning, Beautiful."

She mumbles a greeting and rolls over, her eyes still closed. I grin and kiss the tip of her nose, watching as a smile creeps across her face.

"It's time to wake up." I whisper, kissing each of her cheeks and then her forehead, "Sharon."

"Just a few more minutes." She begs, her voice sleep-laden, "Provenza can handle it."

"Come on, it's time to get up." I sing, gently kissing her lips before tickling her sides. This should wake her up.

"Andy stop!" She laughs, squirming to get away, "Okay, okay I'll get up!"

"That's better." I smile, capturing her lips as we both rise from the bed, "It's gonna be a long day."

"I know." She sighs, wrapping her arms around my waist before burying her face in my shoulder, "I really don't want to do this."

"I don't either." I nod, rubbing her back, "But we have to. We don't have a choice."

_Today's the day we get briefed on our newest case, the man that looked like me. _

ASASASASASASASAS

"What did you find out?" Sharon asks, stepping ahead of me and into the murder room, "Lieutenant!"

"Yes, ah, Captain," Provenza glances at us, "I need to speak with the two of you."

_Dammit, now what?_ Sharon nods and we all walk towards her office.

ASASASASASASASAS

"What is it?!" I ask Louie angrily as I close Sharon's office door, "What?"

"Lieutenant, please explain." She asks kinder, "Now."

"Well I wasn't gonna be the one to tell _them_," he motions to the murder room, "about _you_!"

"Look, it's not relevant." I argue, "It's none of their business."

"Like hell it isn't!" He raises his voice, "We found something else if you two idiots would care to listen."

I quickly glance at Sharon and see her eyeing Provenza angrily, "What the hell is going on Lieutenant? I suggest as your superior officer you tell me what is going on right this instant."

"The victim's name is Andrew." He states, but I can tell he's holding something back.

"Lieutenant, I know there's more going on than just that. I'm not new at this." She grumbles, crossing her arms over her chest, "What else did you find?"

"The... Ah..." He scratches his chin, "Captain, the security videos and interviews you requested, it seems that Stroh somehow convinced everyone in that goddamned facility that he was a psychiatrist."

"And..." She coaxes, "What about the video? Did you get anything back from that?"

"Actually, yes." He sighs, "Stroh kidnapped a boy that looks like Rusty."

"And you couldn't have been bothered to call me?!" She raises her voice, anger welling up in her eyes, "Well?!"

"Taylor relieved you and placed me in command!" He argues, "We're following all the leads we have and continuing with the patient interviews. This is a goddamned mess, you can gladly take it back!"

"Lieutenant I think you need to remember _who_ you are talking to." Sharon says coldly, "I'm not some suspect, I am your boss, and you _must_ remain cognizant of that."

"Doesn't seem to be a problem for you and Andy-"

"Louie!" I raise my voice and grab his arm, pulling him quickly towards me, "Get back out there and work the damned case!"

ASASASASASASASAS

Sharon's in her own world, her hand is over her mouth and she's staring straight ahead. _Kidnapping isn't something Stroh does. _

"Call Rusty. Bring him here." I suggest, walking towards her and gently squeezing her shoulders, "Come here." I pull her into a hug and rub her back, waiting for her to process the new information.

"Andy, this was a mistake." She tries to pull away but I only hug her tighter, "Please let go." I loosen my grip and she steps out of my grasp, rubbing her eyes, "I put you in danger. I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize Sharon, I put myself in this position."

"No you didn't." She turns away from me and crosses her arms over her chest, "It's like you said, 'I won't let you fall on a sword for me.'"

"Sharon, please think about what you're saying." I beg, slowly stepping towards her, "What do you expect me to do? I told you I'm going to protect you and Rusty, and up until now that was fine. What's going on?!"

"You're going to get yourself killed." She replies quietly, "I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you died protecting Rusty or me. As much as I love you, I can't have you doing this. I need you to move back to your place."

_No. She couldn't be doing this. Not again_.

"Sharon you dropped the detail, I won't."

"You _will_." She replies strongly, finally turning to look at me, "As a member of my protective detail, your services are no longer required."

"How can you do this so easily?!" I raise my voice slightly, trying and failing to meet her eyes, "How can you just push me away like this. We love each other, we were gonna get married. How can you act like nothing happened between us?!"

"You are my Lieutenant in the workplace. That is where we are. I need to go get Rusty." She picks up her purse and storms out of her office.

ASASASASASASASAS

"Cooper, hey, it's Flynn." I tap my fiver on the back of my phone nervously.

"Flynn, what's up?" He asks.

"Actually, I ah, I have a favor to ask you..." I scratch the back of my neck, "Do you have a minute?"

"Yeah. How can I help?" He asks excitedly.

"I need you to start an undercover protection detail for the Captain and Rusty. _Immediately_. Whatever it costs, I'll pay it."

"She'll pick up on it right away." He sighs, "Why do you want me to do this?"

"Stroh... He's closing in and she dropped the uniformed officers. She won't let me stay anymore either. I want to keep them safe."

"I'll do my very best Sir." He answers.

"Thanks, Chuck."


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: A little shameless self-promotion- check out my new story _The Mighty Fall._ Enjoy!

~oOo~

Sharon's perspective

~oOo~

Provenza and the team were still working to find what they could on the video from the hospital, so I thought it would be best to stay with Rusty. I told him Andy wouldn't be living (for lack of a better word) with us anymore and he went to his room, slamming the door for affect. I can't deal with him at the moment, especially not after what I said to Andy today. What I'm doing is _completely_ insane, not only do I love him, I am putting Rusty and myself at an even higher risk. I don't want to, I really don't, but if one of us has to jump in front of a bullet to save my son, I'd rather it be me. After all, I don't expect Andy to be on a suicide mission to protect us, even though he seems to be anyway.

A soft knock on the condo door jars me from my thoughts, and as I hurry over, I wish Andy was here. _What if it's Stroh?_

Opening the door I can't help but sigh, "Andy." He's wearing a pair of jeans and a gray t-shirt, "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at work?"

"Provenza sent us home." He won't look at me, "It's almost eleven at night."

"Oh." I lost track of time, "Do you... Want to come in?" I ask, unsure of what he wanted at such an ungodly hour.

"Yeah." He steps through the threshold and jams his hands in his pockets as I close the door, "I just thought I should pick up my things. The sooner you can get me out of here, the better."

"Hey," I reach out and remove his hand from his pocket, gently cradling it in mine, "I want to keep you safe. I don't want you getting hurt because of me."

"I don't want you to get hurt either." He responds, his voice gravely, "And this... This is hurting me Sharon. I can't pretend like I don't care about you and that I don't love you because I do. Nothing is going to change that."

"I love you too." I breathe out, a weight feeling as if it was lifted from my shoulders, "And even though we may not be together, that doesn't change a thing. I'm just so conflicted right now."

"Please, don't shut me out." He begs, finally lifting his eyes to meet mine, "What are you thinking about?"

I let out a light chuckle and squeeze his hand, "Everything. When I told Rusty you would be leaving he locked himself in his room and all I could think about was how important you are to both of us. But the other part of me wants to protect you from whatever Stroh is planning because... because I need you Andy. _We_ need you, and I don't know if I could handle losing you."

"You won't have to. I'm not going anywhere." He assures me, reaching out with his free hand to caress my cheek, "I don't care if you don't want me around, I'm not leaving. I'll rent out the condo next door if you don't want to see me again, but you have to let me do this, please."

"I'm not a damsel in distress." I roll my eyes, honestly touched my his words, "I don't need you to protect me."

"I know." He nods, "But," he lets out a deep breath, "if it comes down to it, you're not going to beat Stroh in a fistfight."

He's right, but that doesn't make this any easier. We're both making these choices to protect the other, but we're hurting each other at the same time.

"You're right." I sigh, reaching up and wrapping my arms around his neck, "I love you."

He chuckles and hugs me back, kissing the side of my head, "I love you too. We don't have anything to worry about, I promise."

I want to believe him, I do, and as much as I trust him, there's still the possibility for things to go terribly wrong.

"I'm scared." I breathe out, pinching my eyes shut as a few stray tears attempt to escape, "I don't want to put you in danger Andy. You have Nicole and the kids to think-"

He cuts me off with a strong kiss, "I have you and Rusty to think about too."

"I'm not gonna win this argument, am I?" I tease, running a hand up and down his chest, "You're too stubborn for your own good sometimes."

"You're not gonna win." He smiles, "And you're just as stubborn, that's why we go so well together."

"You think?" I'm standing on my tip-toes so my eyes can meet his, "It only seems to make things more difficult."

"Yeah, sometimes, but we work through it. Because as stubborn as we are when it comes to our decisions, we're even more stubborn about keeping the other one around."

I lean forward and gently kiss his lips, more than ecstatic to have worked through everything, "I don't want you to leave."

"Good." He breathes when we end the kiss, our foreheads touching, "I'm not planning on it."


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: I got a comment on one of my other stories saying the characters couldn't do _x, y,_ and _z_ because they did _a, b,_ and _c_ in this story. Each of my stories is set in their own special little universe, they aren't one giant fic (as cool as that would be.) Any inconsistencies from story to story exist because they aren't meant to occur on the same timeline. Anyways, rant over! :)

~oOo~

Andy's Perspective

~oOo~

"Sharon?" I whisper, reaching over to wrap my arms around her waist, "Sharon, what's wrong?"

I feel her pull her knees up to her chest and shake her head, inching away from me ever so slightly.

"Come here." I groan as I sit up, pulling her into my lap, "Sweetheart, what's going on?"

She just shakes her head again, hiding her face in her knees. _How can I help her when I don't know why she's so upset?_

"Hey," I kiss her head and gently trace up and down her back, "I'm right here Sharon."

"I know." She finally sniffles, "And that... that's..."

"Take a deep breath." I try, reaching up to gently stroke her cheek, "Take your time sweetheart. I'll still be here."

"That's... That's what's wrong." She picks up her head, burying her face in my chest as she continues crying, "What if one day you're not?"

"I told you I'm not going anywhere, and I meant that. We're going to find the boy, arrest Stroh, and then we'll get married. Everything's gonna be fine."

"It's... It's too good to be real Andy. Just... I'm afraid I'll wake up and it'll all be some silly dream."

_Too good to be real? Are we talking about the same thing here? Because having a serial killer after us isn't exactly my idea of a silly dream_.

"This is real, Sharon." I coo, gently rocking from side to side, "This is all real. You, me, Stroh, and as much as I wish some of it were a dream, it's not. But as soon as we catch Stroh, we can start dreaming of our life. _Together_."

"What if I change?" She asks, lifting her chin to better look at me. Her eyes are swollen and her cheeks are tear stained, but her voice is composed once again.

"What do you mean?" I question, leaning down and planting a kiss to her forehead, "We all change. It's a part of life."

"No, Andy, what if _I_ change. What if I push you away again and don't let you back in? What if something happens to one of us and I turn bitter? What if one day you wake up and you don't feel the same way about me anymore? I just..."

All of a sudden, I knew what -or rather _who_\- had caused this: Jack. Trying my best to stay calm despite all the harm he had caused Sharon took nearly all my strength. If I ever get the chance to lay my hands on him, I won't even think twice about it. He was the reason that Sharon was curled up in my lap, crying in the middle of the night. He made her think that their failed marriage was her fault, and she had believed him.

"Have I ever not came through when I told you something?" I ask, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear and watching as it quickly falls in front of her eyes again.

"No." She shakes her head, "You haven't. But I still feel like maybe-"

"No maybes." I interrupt, gently wiping away the last few tears that clung to her lashes, "When I told you I loved you, that was the truth, and it sure as hell isn't gonna change. I said I'd stay and take care of you and the Kid, and we said we would get married. I made you a promise and I'm going to follow through with it because I love you Sharon, not because I'm trying to string you along just so I can leave. This is real, everything I feel for you is so real, and I won't ever leave you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I'd be crazy to give that up."

"Really?" She lets out a watery laugh, her jade eyes locking with mine, "God, Andy, why do I keep doing this to myself?"

"Because you're Sharon." I shrug with a small smile, "That's another reason we go so well together, you overthink and I don't think enough."

She lets out a little laugh-snort and I pull her closer to my chest, "That's not true."

"Right. Mhm." I respond sarcastically, "So I was thinking straight when I called you the wicked witch and treated you like a piece of crap?"

"Hey." She places her hand on my cheek and forces me to look at her, "That was the past. We've both made mistakes, and if I'm not allowed to sit here and think back on them then neither are you."

"How did I ever end up with someone so wonderful?" I question as she breaks free from my grasp and curls up beside me.

"Ditto." She smiles happily, pulling my arms around her waist, "I love you, Andy."

"I love you too." I grin, gently kissing her lips, "Let's get some sleep. It's going to be a long couple of days."

~oOo~

_Hectic_. That's the best word I can use to describe the scene Sharon, Rusty, and I find when we enter the murder room. Chief Taylor had set up a call center in the middle of the room with phones and iPads, each station occupied by someone I didn't recognize, yet seemed to be working diligently.

"Captain," Chief Taylor's voice echoes throughout the corridor as he comes to stand behind us, "I'm glad to see you're doing such an outstanding job with your team. Lieutenant Provenza has been doing _your_ job for almost two days now."

She reaches out and gently squeezes my arm as I angrily bunch my hands into fists, "Chief, I am doing the best that I can given these circumstances. My family," _Did she_ say _family?_ "is being targeted by a serial killer." Her voice raises ever so slightly, "Not _only_ am I trying to devote my time to this investigation, I am _also_ trying to ensure that my son is living the most normal life that he can given these circumstances. So excuse me if I'm not living up to your standards, I'll make sure to keep everyone late tonight to find this boy." She turns on her heel and starts towards her office when Taylor's voice rings out.

"Captain, I suggest you be _very_ careful with your words." He glances at me for a moment, "You forget how much control I have over _certain situations_."

She shoots him a glare before nodding, her lips pursing into a thin line, "Yes Chief, of course."

He lets out a puff of air and casts Rusty and I one last weary glance before disappearing back down the corridor.

~oOo~

"Lieutenant, what did you find out?" Sharon asks, meeting him in front of the murder board, "Were you able to ID the boy or get a license plate on the car?"

"We're still combing through patient lists, but we haven't been able to identify the boy yet. No missing persons reports were filed, so he either lives on his own or in a bad family."

"Uh, Captain," Buzz pipes up, walking towards her, folder in hand, "I was able to get a license plate from the vehicle Stroh used to escape, and the car was stolen. It's a," he removes a picture from the folder and hands it to her. I come over and stand beside her, hoping to ease her nerves, "2006 silver Chevy Impala. The owner reported it stolen almost a day before the murder. We put a BOLO out and an APB as well."

"Good Buzz, good." She hands me the photo, her hands shaking slightly, "Any news on the previous victims?"

"Morales finished up with them last night." Sykes offers, "But he was acting weird. Wouldn't tell me what he found."

Sharon and I both glance at Provenza and he rolls his eyes theatrically. _Who would have thought Morales could keep a secret?_ Louie must have told him about Sharon and I, and in order for us to investigate this case, they need to know the truth. I look to Sharon and she nods, pulling her lips into her mouth. She wasn't Darth Raydor right now, she wasn't even the Captain. She was _Sharon_, and a very emotional one at that.

"Let me do this." I whisper in her ear and she reluctantly shakes her head.

"No. They won't question it coming from me. And it's time they knew why Stroh is doing this."

"Fine." I rub my forehead, frustrated at the situation that stood before us, "But I'm standing up there with you."

She offers me a warm look, and that's how I know I'm doing the right thing, that _we're_ doing the right thing by telling them this. They should've all been told sooner, but everything started happening so fast that it was hard to keep up. Things were gradually returning to normal -or at least this new sense of normal- and we all need to be willing to adapt to these changes. The team is no exception.

"Excuse me," Sharon clears her throat, walking cautiously towards the murder board. Everyone looks up at us expectantly as she clears her throat again, "Lieutenant Flynn and I have some information that is relevant to the Stroh case." She pauses for a moment and looks to me as Julio hesitantly raises his hand.

"Uh, ma'am, how did you get this information?"

"Well, Julio," her eyes fall to the floor, "you are all aware that the first victim resembled me, correct?" Provenza nods and Sykes mumbles a "yes, Captain." before Sharon continues, "The second victim resembled Lieutenant Flynn, and a startling piece of evidence was found at the scene."

"Just tell them already!" Provenza grumbles and I shoot him a glare, "I'm sorry, please continue, Captain."

"The man that we identified as Andrew Carnegie had an engagement ring in his pocket." She begins toying with her fingers nervously and I reach out to squeeze her elbow.

The whole team is focused on me now and I clear my throat, shaking my head as I look to them, "What the Captain is trying to say is that Stroh is profiling these victims based off of our relationship."

"Lieutenant, your relationship?" Sykes asks hesitantly.

"Yes, Amy, Lieutenant Flynn and I are engaged." She pauses for a moment, both of us looking to the surprised faces around us, "And our withholding of that information has obstructed the investigation of a _very_ high-profile case. Now that all of the information we have has been brought to light, we can focus on locating and identifying this boy. Thank you everyone." She nods and starts towards her office when Buzz's voice echoes through the murder room.

"Congratulations, Captain." She turns and offers him a small smile, "And Lieutenant."

"Thank you, Buzz." She nods, "But right now we have a missing boy to find. Everyone back on task, please."

"Yes Captain." I give a mock salute as I head to my desk.

"Thank you, Lieutenant." She smiles, her eyes locking with mine, an air of happiness washing over her features, "This is time sensitive, let's go!"

She flees to her office and shuts the door, the team's eyes still locked on me.


	13. Chapter 13

**_LTLA Chapter 14:_**

~oOo~

A/N: I got a complaint that Sharon was being whiny and very OOC, and now I'm determined to fix that. Thanks for the heads up :)

A/N/2: Sorry for the wait between updates, marching band season is kicking into full swing, and after 12 hour days, all I want to do is sleep. I'll do my best to update more frequently!

~oOo~

Third person omniscient (sorry for changing it up)

~oOo~

"God, guys, please be careful!" Rusty begs, avoiding both Sharon and Andy's eyes and focusing instead on the pen on her desk, "Can't you let Chief Howard do this? His team has vests and helmets and machine guns! Machine guns, Sharon! They're equipped for something like this! You're not!"

Andy sends an icy glare in Rusty's direction before letting his gaze soften, _the boy is just scared_ he reminds himself.

"We have vests too." Sharon forces a smile, reaching up to rap her knuckles across Andy's chest, "See? We've both got our vests on." She unbuttons the first few buttons of her purple dress shirt to reveal the dark material of the Kevlar, "Please don't worry about us. We'll be fine and we can move on from all of this."

Rusty glances from his mother to her fiancé wearily, "I really don't want you guys to do this." His gaze falls to the floor and he rocks back on his heels in a way Sharon never realized reminded her of Andy until now.

"Listen, Kid," Andy reaches out and places a gentle hand on Rusty's shoulder, "we have to do this, it's our job. We can't change what we have to do, and as much as I don't want your mother anywhere near that son of a bitch, I hope she's the one that finally shoots the bastard."

"Please, just be careful. I don't know what I'd do if I lost either of you." He breathes out worriedly, wrapping his arms tightly around both Sharon and Andy, crystal tears pooling in the corners of his eyes, "Please."

"We will sweetheart." Sharon assures, her voice shaking as she held tightly to her son, "I promise. Try and stay calm while we're gone, alright? Andrea is going to keep you company, and you'll have two guards too. I made sure one of them was the cute one." She smirks as Rusty releases them from the hug. Andy shoots her a disapproving glare and she lets out a light chuckle, "What's his name again?"

"Nick." Rusty responds as his cheeks flush a light shade of pink. Andy looks back and forth from Sharon to her son as the gears start to click in his head, "Thank you for doing that."

"Don't give them a hard time, please." Sharon teases, reaching up and swiping away one of Rusty's tears with her thumb, "We'll be back for dinner, I promise you that."

"You better be." He replies strongly through the impending tears as Sharon leans in and kisses his cheek, "And you too, Flynn."

"Sure thing Kid." He throws Rusty a lopsided grin in the hopes of easing the boy's nerves, but he could tell that it had failed, "It sounds like a date."

Rusty looks at Andy curiously for a moment as Sharon kisses him goodbye one last time, "Keep her safe Lieutenant, please."

"Of course I will, Kid." He promises, side-hugging Rusty one last time before he and Sharon head into the murder room.

~oOo~

That world seemed so distant now, the world where they played house and promised to make it home in time for dinner. Their venomous parting words still hung heavily in the air as they drew their weapons and headed towards the old building.

_"Sharon you can't go in there. It's dangerous."_

_"I could say the same thing to you. It's just like you told Rusty, we don't have a choice."_

_"No Sharon, you _can't_ go in there. I won't let you."_

_"Dammit Andy, I'm going in. You can't stop me. I'm not some damsel in distress. I can take care of myself."_

_"But I-"_

_"No." She fixes him with a hard glare as he parks the car. She unbuckles her belt and exits the car, frustratedly strutting away. _

Julio waving his hands in an attempt to signal Sharon jars her from her thoughts and she nods, flipping the safety off of her gun. She had no idea where Andy was, and part of her didn't care. _As long as he doesn't get himself hurt_.

By now, Chief Howard and SOB had arrived on scene, and the small drone flying above the abandoned warehouse was able to pinpoint Stroh's location. It was a textbook hostage situation, one shooter, one victim, backed into a corner, a large caliber handgun pressed against the boy's head.

_The boy, s_eventeen year old Aaron Bell, had finally been identified. His parents had gone out of town on vacation, and he had walked to the hospital for his weekly meeting with a psychologist. It seemed to be a classic case of 'wrong place, wrong time,' although Phillip Stroh was hardly one to act on impulse. The only thing that mattered now was that everyone made it out alive, even Stroh if they could help it, _even though turning the son of a bitch into Swiss cheese was a tempting idea_.

"Captain, we're waiting on your orders." Chief Howard's voice explains as her earpiece crackles to life, "We've got a sniper on him, but it's close. If he moves an inch, we risk hitting the boy."

"Damn it." She breathes out, "Okay, Chief, keep the sniper on him. Sykes, Andy, Tao, and Provenza, where are you? Do you have a visual on Stroh?" She whispers into her microphone as she and Sanchez kneel down behind a crate.

"I don't have a shot but I can see him." Amy replies, "He's using that kid as a shield."

"I'm going to go talk to him." Sharon decided quickly, "Chief, _do not_ tell your sniper to fire unless Stroh aims his gun at me. Do you understand?"

"Ten-four." The sniper responds.

"Okay, I want all of you to stay low. I want both of them alive."

"Sharon I don't think this is a good idea." Andy tries to dissuade her over the radio system, "You promised Rusty you'd make it home tonight and now you're going to negotiate with a serial killer?! Think about this!"

"I have." She replies, "This has gone on long enough."

"Sharon-" Andy's words are cut off as she removes her earpiece and nods at Julio, swallowing her nerves as she stepped out into the open space that was once an assembly line.

"Captain Raydor, how nice of you to finally meet with me." Stroh calls from behind the boy, "This is my friend Aaron. I really hope I don't have to blow his brains all over the walls today. It would be a real shame. He was one of my favorite patients."

Aaron started to call out for Sharon to help him, but Stroh pressed the gun harder against his temple, telling him to shut up.

"I'm willing to make a deal with you, no one else has to die." She states calmly, taking one long stride after the other, "Why are you doing this?"

"Because of _you!_" He exclaims, a look of pure rage on his face, "_You_ are the reason I went to prison! _You_ are the reason all of those people are dead! It's all _you_ and _your pathetic excuse of a family'_s fault!"

"_You_ killed them. _You_ killed the Judge, _you_ killed the women that looked like me, the man that looked like Lieutenant Flynn, and _you_ kidnapped this boy." She shoots back, her glare hardening.

"Captain, do me a favor." Stroh waves his gun at her for a moment, "Your sidearm, on the ground please." She reaches down to her right hip and presses the release on her holster, lifting the gun out with two fingers, "Good, now put it on the ground and kick it towards me." Sharon obeys and kicks the gun towards him, crossing her arms over her chest, "You seem rather nonchalant considering I can kill you and this wonderful boy in a matter of seconds." He smiles deviously, "You're on a suicide mission, aren't you Captain?"

"Aren't you?" She replies, "You don't honestly think I came here by myself, do you?" She remarks with a sarcastic laugh, "I thought you were a criminal mastermind."

_"Dammit Sharon, calm down!" She hears Andy quietly exclaim through the earpiece that hung on her chest, "You need to be careful!_"

"Oh, Captain Raydor, some things never change, do they?" He smirks, adjusting the boy's position to better obscure his skull, "You still think you rule the world, don't you? Still got Flynn wrapped around your finger too if I'm not mistaking. Here's something you haven't learned about me Captain: I don't make deals when I know I'll be getting the short end of the stick."

"You should've thought about that before you killed the Judge. He was going to let you off easier than anyone else will. He was even your friend. I can't imagine killing a friend, but you, I could see myself pumping your chest full of lead. One of my favorite dreams of late, actually."

_"Sharon!" Andy exclaims again over the radio, "Stop before you get yourself killed!_"

"It seems we have something in common then." Stroh replies with a grin, "I do quite enjoy the idea of killing you. Those other women, they were just surrogates. You ruined my life, I'd love to be able to do the same to that streetwalker of yours, make sure he never forgets what your lifeless body looks like. Then I'll kill him too, leave your Lieutenant to suffer on his own. I wouldn't even have to kill him, a coward like that, he'd do it himself." He laughs, "Really, this is exciting. I almost forgot about your other children, I'll have to plan something nice for them and the Lieutenant's kids. Did you know his grandchildren are big fans of _Clue_? It'd be a shame if they just so happened to meet Colonel Mustard in the kitchen with a revolver, wouldn't it?"

_"That's it!" Andy barks over the radio, "I'm coming out!"_

"You're walking a very thin line here." Sharon warns, her voice dangerously low.

"No, asshole, you've crossed that line!" Andy exclaims, emerging from the shadows, his gun pointed square at Stroh, "Give me one reason not to blow your brains out right now?" He asks, his jaw clenching as he steadied the gun with his left hand.

"Because I can do this." Stroh grins before pointing his gun and Sharon and squeezing the trigger.

Everything seemed as if it were moving in slow motion. When Stroh fired the shot, Aaron was able to move just far enough for both Andy and Fritz's sniper to shoot him in the forehead. He saw Sharon fall to the ground and was instantly kneeling beside her, his hand gripping hers tightly as he checked for a bullet wound. _Thank god she had only been hit in the vest_. Without hesitation he scoops her up in his arms and kisses her forehead.

"It's going to be okay Sharon. You're okay." He tries to soothe her, knowing from experience that a shot to the vest hurt like hell and would definitely leave a few bruises and broken ribs, "I know it hurts, but just breathe."

"Andy I'm fine." She argues, looking up at him through clouded eyes, "Go help them secure the scene. I'll be okay until the ambulance gets here. I've been through worse."

"That doesn't make me feel any better." He responds, bending down and pressing his cheek against hers, "Why the hell did you do that Sharon? You almost got yourself killed."

"So did you." She whispers against his ear, "We both could've died Andy. We were so close to leaving Rusty on his own again I-"

"Shh, it's okay." He coos as she starts to shiver in his arms, "Sweetheart you're going into shock I need to cover you up and keep you warm. Can I sit you down?"

"I'm fine." She argues again but nearly loses her balance when her feet hit the ground.

"Put your arms out." He instructs and she does as he asks, his light purple dress shirt and grey jacket hanging loosely against her thin frame, "There you go." He picks her back up and kisses her again, her hands curling into the thin material of his white t-shirt, "You're going to be fine Sharon, just a few more minutes." He whispers, running a hand soothingly through her disheveled hair, "I'm right here. We'll make it home to Rusty, I promise."

"I'm... Fine..." She mumbled again as her eyes slowly fluttered closed, "You shot him, I'm fine."


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: When I started this chapter, I planned to have maybe two or three more after posting. Since finishing this chapter, I feel like I could end it here. So comment, let me know what I should do :)

~oOo~

Andy's Perspective

~oOo~

"Are you sure she's okay?" Rusty questions worriedly, pacing back and forth in front of me in the kitchen, "You said you would keep her safe!"

"Sharon is fine." I state again, although I don't quite believe it myself, "Give her a few days and she'll be back to her old self."

"Lieutenant I've never seen her like that!" He exclaims again, "She was so pale and cold!"

"We already went to the hospital." I sigh and massage my temples, losing track of how many times I've told Rusty this, "She's got some bruises on her ribs and she went into shock. She'll be sore for a day or two, but Sharon will be fine."

"What can we do to help her?" He finally stops pacing and glances up at me, his eyes full of worry.

"The doctor said she just needs some rest. I'm supposed to wake her up every two hours and give her some painkillers. You can come check on her with me if you want, she still has half an hour yet."

"Thanks Lieutenant." Rusty nods, heading to the refrigerator and getting each of us a bottle of water, "Stroh's really gone?"

"Mhm." I shake my head in response and close my eyes, the image of him laying there with two holes in his skull burned into my memory, "It's all over. I mean, FID still has to do an investigation, and there's still going to be paperwork that needs to be done, but we can finally get back to our lives."

"Did she... Did she shoot him?" He asks hesitantly, coming to sit beside me on a barstool.

"No." I shake my head sadly, "I did. And so did Chief Howards' sniper."

"What the hell Andy." He says solemnly, twisting his water bottle open and taking a long swig, "What happened out there? Why the hell would she let herself get shot?!"

How do I even tell him the risk Sharon took today? Do I tell him? Or do I let her when she feels up to it? How do I tell him his mother could have died because she wanted his nightmare to finally be over?

"Rusty, you know Sharon and I both love you, right?" I ask and he looks at me awkwardly, no doubt because I used the 'L' word in reference to him, "And sometimes, when we really care about someone, we're willing to go to extreme measures to ensure their happiness and safety."

"If she would've died today..." His voice trails off and his gaze falls to the floor as he lets out a deep sigh, "I would've been the opposite of happy and safe."

"But she didn't." I repeat again, reaching out and squeezing his shoulder, "She's in the other room sleeping. I know you're scared," I sigh and reach up to cover my mouth with my hand, "trust me, when I saw her laying there I was more than afraid of all the different things that could've happened to her. But you have to understand that Sharon and I, we go to work every day knowing we might not make it home at night. And the thought that today could be the last day that I see her, or you, or Nicole and the kids is beyond terrifying, but we have to live with it. A career this dangerous is something Sharon and I have chosen, but the important thing is that she made it home today, that both of us made it home today."

"I hate this." He sighs, letting out a puff of air and bouncing his leg up and down nervously, "This is all my fault. If I never worked the streets I never would've met Stroh and Sharon wouldn't be hurt."

"If it wasn't Stroh, it would've been someone else. None of this is your fault. I know how hard it is to accept that. The only way it would be your fault was if you shot her. Believe me, I blame myself for this too, I could've stopped her but i didn't. I let my temper get the best of me and that's why Stroh fired. That- that's my fault. That's on me, I'm gonna have to deal with that. But you, none of this is your fault."

"No it is! This is all my fault I-" My phone ringing causes Rusty to quiet down, and I see that it's my alarm to go check on Sharon. Offering the boy the most hopeful smile I can muster, I pull the bottle of her painkillers from my pocket and head towards her bedroom.

~oOo~

"Sharon, sweetheart," I hesitantly push the bedroom door open, followed by an awkward Rusty, "Sharon."

She offers a grumble in response but makes no attempt to move out from under her nest of blankets and pillows that she had demanded when I brought her home. Under normal circumstances I would have found it adorable, but with everything that happened earlier, it worried me. I want more than anything for her to be okay.

"Hey, I have some medication for you." I state quietly as I come to sit on the side of the bed, folding back two of the blankets so I could see her, "Sharon." I lean down and place a gentle kiss to her forehead, overjoyed that her skin was starting to flush with color and that she was warming up.

"I feel like shit." She grumbles, opening her eyes and wincing as she pushed herself up in the bed, "Rusty!" She exclaims, her voice still half sleep-laden, "Oh my God! Sweetheart come here!"

I've never seen that boy more grateful for a hug in my entire life. Almost immediately he was in her arms, each of them allowing the tears they'd been holding back to fall.

Watching the scene in front of me, I can't help but want to be a part of it too. The thought that I could've lost Sharon today scared the hell out of me, and I've come to love Rusty like he was my own these past few months. Without hesitation I wrap my arms around the two of them, finally letting my tears fall with theirs. Between the mixed whispers of "I'm sorry." "We're gonna be okay." and "I love you." the thought that had been bouncing around my head recently became even more real. We were a family, and we were going to get through this together.


End file.
